We suck. This is bad. We’ll probably win this week. If we don’t…
We suck. This is bad. We’ll probably win this week. If we don’t…
The ‘Cats are sliding backwards, now sitting at 1-6 on the year after 5 straight losses. Can they turn things around in Bloomington in a night game against the 5-2 Hoosiers? Let’s see what the Warriors think.
Game Summary: Well we had been trending closer and closer so it’s not a surprise that the ‘Cats got shut out on Saturday. In 5 of our 7 games this year, we’ve scored 10 points or less. That’s mind boggling.
I would say there’s good news and bad news, but surprisingly it’s really only good news. Firstly, this offensive ineptitude has whipped up what’s left of the fan base into a fury directed at Mick McCall. Fitz better get rid of McCall this offseason and use him as a scapegoat, because otherwise that fury will take aim at him. When your stadium is not even half full on Homecoming (and it wasn’t just because of the rain), the administration is going to take notice. Saturday was rock bottom for the Fitz era, no doubt about it.
The other good news is that we all know we’re bad, and thus there is no stress or pressure in watching a ‘Cats game. Our tailgate last Saturday was a blast, because you barely even needed to watch the game and could focus on the important things like drinking and more drinking.
My analysis of this Saturday’s game is that Indiana is actually pretty good, and Northwestern is not. Indiana is the only B1G team (aside from Maryland, against whom we are 1-0) who we have a winning record against. We are almost 13 point underdogs in Bloomington in a strange night game – my biggest guidance to you would be to take the under. Instead of further analysis, enjoy this drinking game for Saturday:
Sack – sip your beer
Offensive 3 and out – 1 drink
Change at QB – 2 drinks
Aidan Smith pick – 1 shot
Hunter Johnson pick – 2 shots
Safety – Malort shot
FG – Finish your beer
NU Touchdown – Vegas Bombs!
Game Score: NU 6 – Indiana 24
Play of the Game: We score points!
Player to Watch: Hunter Johnson
Warrior to Watch: Z Von
Other Game to Watch: Nebraska – Purdue. Nothing like some bad B1G football.
Game Summary: Indiana is not half bad. They are going bowling which is more than we can say for ourselves. I don’t think their defense is especially good, but their offense can score points in a hurry and we can not. I predict we will end our touchdown drought, but the game is never in doubt for Indiana.
Game Score: NU 13 – Indiana 27
Play of the Game: Drake Anderson TD scamper.
Player to Watch: Mick McCall – can he do anything against an average defense (#42 according to SP+)
Warrior to Watch: Trent – he came up with a drinking game for goodness sake.
Other Game to Watch: Gotta be the World’s Largest Outdoor Cocktail Party, right?
Have we reached the floor yet? Or do we still have further to fall? Note to Z Von (resident further/farther expert): while you could argue the use of either “further” or “farther” here (I’d listen and probably disagree), “further” makes more sense. Yes, we are referring to a distance which would ordinarily imply farther. However, in this case, the distance is metaphorical (though, for Marv in the video, it’s real). Thus, further. QED.
The offense can’t get any worse. I suppose we could score fewer than 13 points in November, but that’s about the only way it can get worse for them.
The defense can certainly get worse though. I fear it will in this one.
Game Summary: From an X’s and O’s perspective, Ohio State and Indiana are our two worst matchups this season. This Indiana team ran up and down the field with a backup qb against a very good Michigan State defense. They are VERY likely to do the same to us.
Unfortunately, our offense is appreciably worse than Michigan State’s.
This one will get ugly in a hurry as Indiana races to an impressive 7-2 start to the season.
Game Score: NU 7 – Indiana 45
Play of the Game: Andrew Marty throws a garbage TD pass in the 4th quarter. Hooray, points!
Player to Watch: Fitz – he’s being a real asshole and showing that he can’t handle adversity. Furthermore, I’m starting to wonder if Mick has become a convenient scapegoat for problems that stem from the head coach. The ‘Cats don’t need to win here (let’s not ask for too much), but Fitz damn sure better come to play.
Warrior to Watch: Z Von – he’s gonna have the Nest rockin.
Other Game to Watch: The Cocktail Party for sure. This is being overlooked here, but both UF and UGA still control their own destiny. Watch out for those Dawg fans in St. Simon’s Island this weekend.
Game Summary: meh
Game Score: NU 10 – Indiana 21
Play of the Game: The van takes a well deserved week off.
Player to Watch: Hunter and/or Aidan
Warrior to Watch: Trent – please make sure he survives his drinking game.
Other Game to Watch: Florida – Georgia because of course
Game Summary: It’s a night game so that’s fun, I guess.
Game Score: NU 12 – Hoosiers 18
Play of the Game: Mick runs a draw play on 3rd and 13
Player to Watch: Will Hunter play?
Warrior to Watch: Bag after the 3rd quarter.
Other Game to Watch: Super boring week. WLOCP it is.
The ‘Cats got shut out on Homecoming last week and have scored 13 points in October. This week’s Thursday Pump Up Jam is something we’ve all been thinking as we’ve watched our boring team plod around over the past month. This is dedicated to Mick McCall – “You don’t score enough, I mean no offense!”
The ‘Cats got trounced by Ohio State last Friday, but it’s Homecoming week so who cares? Iowa comes into town in what should be a low scoring defensive battle. Let’s see who the Warriors have in this one.
Game Summary: The ‘Cats offense has scored 38 points in our four conference games this year, only putting up more than 10 points once. Iowa’s got a good defense and I see this trend continuing.
Our defense is better than it looked against Ohio State last week – the Buckeyes just had way too many athletes and torched our secondary. Justin Fields is legit – OSU looks like the best team in the country right now. We should hold Iowa’s offense in check – this will be a very low scoring game as the 37 over/under indicates. Get ready for some boring ass B1G football.
In Fitz’s press conference Monday, when asked about the offense’s struggles he facetiously mimed looking under and around the podium for some kind of antidote that would fix everything. Well I don’t see any magic beans coming this week, Jack.
Game Score: NU 5 – Iowa 13
Play of the Game: Gaziano sack for a safety
Player to Watch: Bowser. My boy ran pretty well last week against OSU.
Warrior to Watch: Hack. It’s his birthday week!
Other Game to Watch: ND – Mich
Game Summary: What can I say. Hard to win football games if you can’t score. Obviously the offense is a dumpster fire, but we haven’t had any defensive scores this season either. Without a pick six Saturday, I don’t see any chance of us winning either. Let me be cleaya, Iowa is not good, but unless Jesus takes the wheel at OC this week, I don’t see how we can possibly beat them. Fire Mick.
Game Score: Iowa 17 – NU 9 — Did we botch a two point conversion or kick 3 FGs? Only time will tell. Under bettors rejoice.
Play of the Game: Some sort of turnover forced by the defense? Please boys. We need ya.
Player to Watch: Riley Lees – hoping he trots out as the starting QB this week. Hell, he played in HS, how much worse could he be?
Warrior to Watch: Trent – He’s firing up the van bright and early. Will he be able to handle our brand new dish?
Other Game to Watch:Auburn @ LSU (Geaux Tigers)
Last week went as expected.
Play of the Game: NU picks off a terrible Stanley toss and returns it inside the 10 setting up our only score of the game.
Player to Watch: the D Line. Kent and Brown are out for this one. The D is our only hope.
Warrior to Watch: Trent..he’s in charge.
Other Game to Watch: Auburn @ LSU… LSU is playing with fire each week with a very suspect defense.
Game Summary: Cats Lose
Play of the Game: The Iowa kneel-down to end the
Player to Watch: No one.
Warrior to Watch: Trent
Other Game to Watch: Wisco to get blown out by OSU in the Horseshoe.
Cats 69 – Iowa 42
The Trevor Bauer score
Game Summary: oof
Play of the Game: THE VAN STARTS (again)
Player to Watch: Bowser back?
Warrior to Watch: Gotta be bag
Other Game to Watch: Wisco gets further exposed by the buckeyes.
I think this about sums it up. Go ‘Cats!
The ‘Cats take on Ohio State in Evanston on a … FRIDAY NIGHT? Too bad the Keg of Evanston is closed, RIP. Luckily, it did not go gentle into that good night.
The Warriors’ contingent may be small for this game, but boy is it mighty. We’re going to need it as the Buckeyes come to town in what should be an overwhelming contingent of red. Let’s check out our predictions for the game.
Game Summary: I got a feeling. Just got a feeling. The ‘Cats are 1-4, morale is quite bad, and the fan base is calling for McCall’s head. We are 25+ point underdogs on Friday at home against a top three Ohio State team, who you could argue has looked the best of any team in the country to-date. It’s the largest spread against us since Notre Dame in ’95. We all know what happened then.
No one thinks we will be remotely competitive in this game. Our defense is great, our offense is atrocious. How will we score any points against OSU? Even if we can hold their offense in check, we still need to outscore them (that’s typically how you win a football game). How in the world will that happen?
The past two years, OSU has had a weird conference loss on the road. Two years ago, they lost 55-24 at Iowa. Last year, they got blown out 49-20 at Purdue. The ‘Cats ain’t putting up 50 points in this one, I can tell you that. But, this has a similar feel in that it’s a weird conference game on the road.
It’s a Friday night game coming after a bye – I haven’t done any research but not sure we’ve ever played a game on a Friday before. It’s a weird situation. Ohio State will be looking ahead as they play a top 10 Wisconsin team next week.
Nothing against Ryan Day, who seems so far like he’s a great coach, but he simply isn’t Urban Meyer. He hasn’t been in a close game yet – neither has Justin Fields at OSU. It’s not the easiest thing for a team that’s been on cruise control the whole year to all of a sudden be thrown into a pressure packed situation in what should be a raucous Ryan Field atmosphere. Raucous for which team, I know not (if I had to guess it’ll be 60-70% OSU fans), but raucous nonetheless. If this game is somehow close after three quarters those Buckeyes’ butt cheeks will tighten. You bet that Fitz has had this game circled since last year – not just because it’s Ohio State, but also because they beat us in the B1G title game. He wants revenge (we’ve never beaten OSU with Fitz as head coach).
I subscribe to the George Costanza theory that if nothing is working for you, try doing the opposite. The best thing for those who care about the long term health of the ‘Cats this year is for us to get our doors blown off and then have a poor rest of the year, which should then lead to some coaching changes (cough McCall cough). If you look at it that way, it’s not necessarily a great thing for us to beat OSU, as that will give more reason for Fitz to not make any changes. As ‘Cats fans we can never have nice things, and it feels like we’ll be unsatisfied after this year – one way or another. We’re engrained as a fanbase to expect the ‘Cats to do something stupid and screw it up – the short term gain from beating OSU here would actually likely work against us in the long run.
Continuing down the opposite track – the ‘Cats are just a weird team and tend to do the opposite of what we expect. Every year it seems like we have a very bad loss – whether it’s Illinois State or Akron (I wonder if this is something in our DNA dating back to the loss against Miami of Ohio in ’95). Then we’ll typically beat a ranked team we shouldn’t. We zig when people think we’re going to zag.
Well this feels like a zig-zag game to me. There is no rational reason for this pick other than the fact that there’s no rational reason for this pick. Does that make any sense?
I got a feeling. Go ‘Cats.
Game Score: NU 24 – OSU 21
Play of the Game: ‘Cats get a defensive TD as Travis Whillock scoops and scores a fumble. Northwestern must score either on defense or special teams to be competitive in this game.
Player to Watch: I’ve got a feeling…that Hunter will start.
Warrior to Watch: Paul is in town for his first tailgate of the season.
Other Game to Watch: During the course of our tailgate on Friday, we’ll have a few appetizer games – Marshall @ FAU on CBSSN (5:30pm kick) and Pitt @ Cuse on ESPN (6:00pm kick). I’m not 100% sure we get CBSSN but we will find out. These will quite literally be the other games we’ll watch as we drink beer amongst a sea of red.
I’ll also go to the NFL, where it’ll be Pats @ Jets on Monday night. Fellow Patriots fans…beware…
The Cats didn’t win last week, but they didn’t lose.
Unfortunately, the team actually has to play this week. Against Ohio State no less.
The Buckeyes have looked like one of the best teams in the country thus far. For whatever reason, they seem to have cleaned up the mental lapses that were all too common under Urban Meyer. So, I don’t expect them to not show up this week or any week down the stretch.
Game Summary: I think NU’s defense will put up a respectable fight. We’re going to get burned on the perimeter and we’re probably going to have issues setting the edge, but pretty much everyone does against Ohio State.
Sadly, a “respectable fight” for NU’s defense is going to look a lot worse in the box score. Why? Well, Ohio State is probably going to have an average starting field position somewhere around midfield. The Chicago Bears defense would struggle in that situation.
I don’t expect the offense to get 10 first downs in this game. We’ll score a garbage touchdown late to avoid getting shutout.
Move on to next week. Then, move on to next year.
Game Score: Ohio State 45 – NU 7
Play of the Game: Gaziano blindsides Smith and forces a fumble. This provides the Cats with their best field position of the game (Aidan throws a pick 2 plays later).
Player to Watch: Aidan… I assume Hunter won’t play because there’s no point in killing his confidence even more. If it’s Aidan, he should just go out there and sling it.
Warrior to Watch: Paul. Welcome back to Evanston, Paul. Too bad most of the crew is MIA this weekend.
Other Game to Watch: Not sure… is there anything good this weekend?
Game Summary: It will look respectable in the first quarter. Maybe 7-0 OSU. But then things are gonna get out of hand. Fast. The defense will basically spend the entire game on the field, and eventually are going to get beat. Should be safe to turn off at half.
Game Score: OSU 45 – NU 3
Play of the Game: The lone field goal. Huzzah!
Player to Watch: Fire Mick McCall (dot) com
Warrior to Watch: Paul. Hands down. He’s from Ohio. He’s at the game. He’s gonna have a few cold ones. Let the boys play.
Other Game to Watch: Let’s say Michigan vs Penn State, because I love watching Michigan lose.
Game Summary: Lolololololol
Game Score: OSU 40 – NU 6
Play of the Game: The Van starts!
Player to Watch: Aidan Smith. F*ck it, I’m going deep.
Warrior to Watch: Paul. I hear he’s gonna try to set the West Lot record for White Claw consumption.
Other Game to Watch: Let’s say Michigan vs Penn State, because I love watching Penn State lose.
Game Summary: Hopefully some stellar D from the Cats. Hopefully improving to below average for the offense and Mick McCall. Cats keep it close, but can’t pull it off.
Game Score: OSU 23 – NU 13
Play of the Game: Strip sack in the first half in OSU territory by Paddy Fisher.
Player to Watch: Paddy Fisher
Warrior to Watch: Am I allowed to say me? Because I’m gonna say me. You can find me with the White Claw wizard staff.
Other Game to Watch: It’s Friday night, so I guess the Yankees Astros??
Cats lose 42-8
Cats win 6-4
3:30pm, getting up to the Evanston
Gotta be fresh, gotta go to Ashland
Gotta have my beer, gotta have Whiteclaw
Seein’ everything, Fitz is goin’
Rollin on and on, Rose is rushin’
Gotta get down to the Lot
Gotta catch Rose, I see the Warriors (Warriors)
Kickin’ in the front seat
Rose doesn’t have any back seats
Gotta make my mind up
Which seat can I take?
It’s Friday, Friday
‘Cats gonna lose big on Friday
Everybody’s lookin’ forward to the West Lot, West Lot
Gettin’ down on Friday
Everybody’s lookin’ forward to the West Lot
Partyin’, partyin’ (yeah)
Partyin’, partyin’ (yeah)
‘Cats, ‘Cats, ‘Cats, ‘Cats
Drinkin’ lot’s of Whiteclaws!