Roger’s Ramblings – A Look Around the College Football Landscape (Week 4)

This season is getting better every week! First, let’s toot our own horn and look back at the end of my NU game prediction from last week:

Despite the relatively close score, by the second half it becomes apparent what’s going down. The ‘Cats D is legit. NU controls the ball for 12 minutes in the 4th quarter and runs out the clock up by two scores. 

Later that evening, Stanford goes into the Coliseum and knocks off USC. Back in Evanston, Gangsta’s Paradise is blaring and locals are wondering if they’ve gone back in time 20 years. 

Nope. We didn’t go back in time. But the schedule looks favorable and this is starting to feel like ’95. 

Next up….. NIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIGHT GAME! Rest assured, the West Lot will be bumpin.

Well…. that was spot on. Yes, the West Lot will most certainly be bumpin’ this Saturday night and you can call me Rogerdamus if you please.

Before we move along to the good, the bad and the ugly (this week’s format), let’s talk about what is now becoming a recurring piece of humor: Brett Bielema and Arkansas. For those who don’t recall, Brett spent the entire past week cleaning egg of his face after losing to Toledo shortly after criticizing Ohio State’s schedule. This week, Bielema and team lost to Texas Tech at home. While this is slightly more respectable on paper, it still left Brett looking like a fool at the hands of Ryan Gosling (aka Kliff Kingsbury). Rest assured, A&M will, in fact, kick Bielema’s ass this week. But, at least Jerry Jones won’t be in the house again, or else Brett would likely get fired on the spot. Woo pig sooie!

Now, let’s get into the fun.

The Good

Kevin Hogan – There was certainly a lot of quality football being played on Saturday night, but yours truly had a watchful eye on the Stanford USC game (for obvious reasons). Boy, was that a treat. Not only did it help to validate NU and what is now the nation’s #1 scoring defense, but watching Hogan pick apart USC’s secondary was like watching Andrew Luck 2.0. Hogan is legit for those who think otherwise after watching him struggle against the ‘Cats. Let’s hope he can play this week and let’s hope that practicing with virtual reality (read the link) is sufficient preparation. Can the Stanford D school get some love for that? As Bag so eloquently put it, “that’s some Stanford shit.” It most certainly is.

Iowa’s Kicker – In case anyone missed it, Marshall Koehn buried a 57 yard field goal as time expired to give Iowa the win over Pitt on Saturday night. This was awesome, but it does beg the question: is icing the kicker counterproductive? Pat Narduzzi called timeout immediately prior to Koehn’s first attempt which gave him the opportunity to go through with the kick (as practice) anyway. The kick wasn’t woefully short, but I’m certainly not going to tell you I thought Koehn had any chance on the next one. He clearly corrected something because he buried it with ease. I bet Pat wishes he didn’t call that timeout. Chris Webber knows a thing or two about that.

The Bad

Minnesota’s Offense – Minnesota as a team gets a pass here because their defense is certainly stout as they demonstrated this in an impressive week 1 performance against TCU. But that offense…… woof. 10 points against Kent State? Kent State lost to Illinois 52-3 just 2 weeks earlier. They clearly aren’t any good. And they clearly don’t have a defense. Thus, Minnesota clearly doesn’t have an offense. Right? Right (warning: the transitive property is only to be used with serious caution and when absolutely warranted). The transitive property applies here for once.

Auburn – Can we get this team out of the coaches poll once and for all? They came damn close to losing to an FCS foe at home and then got absolutely stomped by LSU. All the while, Auburn literally made Leonard Fournette a Heisman candidate. Is Fournette good? Probably. Was he as good as he looked on Saturday? Probably not. But, that’s what happens when you tear up a team that is irrationally nationally ranked. At least Numberfire thinks they suck.

The Ugly

Texas’s Kicker This pretty much sums up the state of the Longhorn program right now. Someone get that guy a drink and then put some soap in Jared Goff’s mouth.

This Week’s Upcoming Kansas @ Rutgers Game – Are you kidding me with this one? The mess at Rutgers is well documented so I won’t get into that. But, the dominos here could not have fallen more perfectly in setting up one of the most wretched games of the decade. While Rutgers is a disaster, Kansas is a complete raging dumpster fire. We’re talking about one of the worst FBS teams of all time. They rival Francis Peay’s NU teams. Meanwhile, they are still paying Charlie the Hut (along with Notre Dame… which tickles me to death)!

Let’s look back at the week that was and assess how we did:

  • Georgia Tech (-2.5) @ Notre Dame – Another key ND player goes down for the season. Fans wonder if Rudy will have to suit up by season’s end. GREAT SUCCESS. We would never wish injury on someone, but it happened again….. while celebrating
  • Auburn @ LSU (-7) – Auburn QB Jeremy Johnson throws at least 2 more picks. LSU covers. KIND OF. Johnson only had 1 pick, but he had a 30.0 QBR and might as well have thrown 10. LSU won big.
  • Ole Miss @ Alabama (-6.5) – Per last week’s comment, Derrick Henry coughs up the ball at the wrong time because he can’t get his pad level down. Ole Miss wins and moves into the top 5.WINNER. Henry didn’t fumble, but Bama turned it over 5 times, Ole Miss won and moved into the top 5.
  • Illinois @ UNC (-10) – Illinois wins. Nobody has any clue if they are actually half decent. WAY OFF. Yikes…. what happened here?
  • Clemson (-6) @ Louisville – Louisville wins. This serves as a friendly reminder not to play the transitive property game. FAIL. I’m blaming this solely on Louisville’s freshman mistakes. They had this game on multiple occasions, but just weren’t interested enough to take it.

Here are some wild predictions for this week:

  • Georgia Tech (-9.5) @ Duke – Duke wins. Northwestern looks even better. Tech’s defense has trouble with Sirk and a vertical passing game.
  • UCF @ South Carolina (-14.5) – UCF gets shut out. Nada. Zip. Zero. No points.
  • Indiana @ Wake Forest (no line yet) – Indiana goes on the road and wins convincingly. Easily the worst 4-0 team in the country.
  • Tennessee @ Florida (-1.5) – In the words of the sage poet, Biggie, “blows was thrown and a f*cking fight broke out!”. Look for a fight and some ejections in this one.
  • TCU (-7) @ Texas Tech – TCU doubles up Tech. Tech gets blown out. This time, Kingsbury gets his ass kicked, but the feud with Bielema continues with some ridiculous post game commentary.

2 thoughts on “Roger’s Ramblings – A Look Around the College Football Landscape (Week 4)

  1. “Remember the movie ‘The Matrix,’ where virtual information popped up to help inform physical day-to-day reality? Such things won’t always be the stuff of Hollywood. If the Internet is accessible via contact lenses, biographies will appear next to the faces of the people we talk to, and we will see subtitles if they speak a foreign language.”

    – Michio Kaku

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